for solo piano ca. 8' for michael dukat (1963-2019): husband, father, friend
all of time and all of space stand between us today. this was not meant to be. you were taken too soon; you had so much life ahead of you. so much to accomplish, to achieve, to celebrate. you didn't have a chance to see the profound effect you had on the people around you. you didn't have a chance to feel the love that surrounded you and the grief of your absence. now here we lay, separated by an insurmountable barrier. one that transcends existence itself. someday, somehow, I will pass through that barrier. I will see you again.
often, I find that self-expression through words comes rather easily to me. for all the time I spend writing music as a form of self-expression, rarely is it a practice I use to replace words. instead, my music tends to be an extension of my words; my music fills the gaps that my words cannot possibly explain. this work is different in that regard. for two years, I struggled to find any medium of expression that I could speak through. I felt as if I had lost my voice entirely. I have found it once again.
premiere performance by justin tan: https://youtu.be/7fNbl_M1spc?t=1699 (timestamp 28:19)